Tuesday, February 23, 2010

Fun with Book Club

To: Book Club Members
From: Rima
Subject: Discussion Questions for March Meeting (Draft)

Here are (in no particular order) the discussion questions for our next book club meeting:
  1. What do you suppose possessed Jenny to select an eight hundred page long book of scholarly historical non-fiction that is EIGHT HUNDRED PAGES LONG as our March title? Be sure to give specific examples in support of your argument.

  2. Did any of you actually read it? Be honest.

  3. Oh rilly? Okay, what musical instrument did Thomas Jefferson play, how many children did he father, and was he taller than Danny DeVito?

  4. Life in colonial Virginia was harsh. Does anyone else think that Forbes magazine's recent ranking of Cleveland as "America's Most Miserable City?" is total bull$hit?

  5. One can only assume that during the time Thomas Jefferson spent living in France, he drank a lot of wine. Do you think that people who claim to have a "red wine allergy" are full of crap? Why or why not?

  6. Thomas Jefferson kept getting his wife pregnant, knowing that childbirth would eventually kill her. What kind of an insensitive, sex crazed pervert was he?

  7. And speaking of childbirth, how many of us have had c-sections vs. vaginal births? What about epidural vs. natural? How much do you want to bet that Team Vagina secretly believes Team C-Section is a bunch of pansies?

  8. Why do you think evolution has not yet eliminated short, nearsighted people?

  9. How come our book club discussions always turn to playground gossip after ten minutes? Do you think we have ADD? In what way is our book club a microcosm of society as a whole?

  10. Have you noticed that this book is 800 pages long?

  11. Do you think it's OK for someone to pick a Danielle Steele novel she read while standing in the supermarket checkout line as the selection of the month?

  12. Does anyone else feel that this book club could really benefit from a gay male perspective?

  13. Why do you think Glenn Beck is always crying? Seriously, what is wrong with that guy?

  14. How does my husband always manage to spray toothpaste scum on his side of the bathroom mirror, while mine is without fail pristine day in and day out?

  15. Is it considered "uncool" to wear your hair up in a butterfly clip?

  16. And finally, have you noticed that the John Locke character on the hit TV show Lost has man boobs?

In closing, I would like to add that I BETTER NOT TURN OUT TO BE THE ONLY SUCKER WHO IS ACTUALLY READING THIS EVERLOVIN' BOOK.

See you on the 12th, everybody!

xo
-Rima

13 comments:

Amy said...

HA! This is hilarious! If it's 800 pages it'd better be gripping. Like Edward Cullen or Outlander gripping...

(Team Vagina totally secretly believes Team C-Section is a bunch of pansies.)

Becca said...

Absolutely hysterical. And ditto #14. What the H?

I was in a book club once that turned more into a montly social gathering we all brought a book to but never discussed.

Unknown said...

Hee-Hee! I wanna join your book club.

Heather said...

800 pages? WTH? My book club better not pick a book like that!

This is hysterical.

Book Club Girl said...

HILARIOUS. I only hope writing this won't turn out to be more fun than your actual meeting!

Barbara said...

snort!! thanks for the laughs.

Life in Eden said...

OMG! My DH has the #14 thing too!

Wish I could join your book club and drink red wine and whine about the playground!

Sally HP said...

That is awesome! I'm forwarding this link to my book club RIGHT NOW!

alejna said...

Oh, Rima, I love you so.

Heather said...

NOw I want to read it. And join your book club.

Magpie said...

so, you're not liking it?

Kelly @ Student of the year said...

5. Red wine gives me migraines. Which sucks.

7. Team c-section. Although it sounds like I'm rooting for them, which I'm not. But I do have the vagina of a teenager. One bonus. And I don't pee when I laugh. Still, I'd rather be on Team Vag.

8. I don't know, but at 5'2", I'm glad I still make the evolutionary cut.

11. No.

13. He is a turd. Plain and simple.

16. Yes. But I still find him attractive for a geezer.

Also, I'm not reading this book, so I hope it's okay that I commented?

painted maypole said...

i want to come to your book club